That One Time I Wore Harem Pants

In four seconds, my schedule got full.

Yep, it's that time of year again. School.

I love it. School is my favorite. Always has, always will. Add in the fact that I have the blessed privilege of living life with other Christians in the greatest community I have ever known....well, it's pretty awesome. 

As I methodically recorded syllabuses, coffee dates, weekly meetings, and Gospel Choir rehearsals into my planner, I realized that a lot is coming. It's almost the weekend, and so far, I've had plenty of time. But that commodity is about to come at a high price. Cue the 12-page papers, overlapping ministry events, and forgetting I had planned to meet someone for lunch today.

When a lot is coming, or a lot is here, we tend to be swept up into the chaos and, before we know it, things that used to be on the priority list get dropped like hot rocks. I find it unusually ironic that the first thing I tend to kick away is my daily quiet time. Here I am, future teacher and minister of God's Word, and here I am, putting off the reading and studying of God's Word.

Looking cute in my new harem pants and heels? Check. Facebook? Of course! Calling my parents, talking with friends, reading for class? Certainly.

But what about the Bible....

I am the guilty culprit of this far too often. Why is it so hard? I absolutely love to read! Yet, there I am, staring at its leather cover with bleary eyes at 12:37am apologizing to God for not doing what I know I should. Not to mention how easy it is as a Bible college to slide into the "Bible equals textbook" mode of thinking. 

As the year kicks into gear, I have to remember the importance of this daily time reading about how my Father wants me to live. Without this, the Bible simply becomes another "resource" instead of the absolute truth I need to live life by. I fail often. Apathy creeps in even more. But, I must fight it. There is no temptation placed in my path that I cannot bear and HAVE to give in to (1 Cor 10:13). Because I am a saved daughter of our Lord, I don't have to give in to sin anymore. I am redeemed and can make the right choice. Commitment and discipline get harder as more life happens, but I can still do what I am called to do!

I pray, Father, that you help me to choose what is right. Even when my planner catches fire, help me to see clearly the importance of your Word.

That One Time I Came Back

The hazy skyline reappeared as a jumbled assortment of lights. A siren, no, make it TWO sirens, screeched in the distance. I walked onto campus. I was back for another round of Chicago, Bible college, and life lessons.

Since arriving on Sunday night, I've been caught in a weird sort of limbo. Let me put it this way: it's going to take a lot longer than I originally thought to become familiar with the unfamiliarity. 

The average college turnover rate is minimum 25% because of graduating seniors, let alone the people who transfer, take time off, or don't return at all. Things have to change; that's life and growth and moving forward. It's exciting, it's weird, it's hard to like, it's great....

It's difficult, but in the best way.

I know the Lord has much in store and much to teach me. He's already teaching me by default by throwing twelve new freshmen girls into my life. My prayer is to love them well. 

Being a part of the campus women's ministry group has thrown me together with some excellent and driven individuals who seek to disciple our campus through Gospel-centered events and small groups. I'm so excited to be a part of it all, especially on the event-planning and administrative side of things. We had a great time tonight kicking off fall training. I love watching people grow in Christ and come together like that.

However, it's been strange not having the same people surrounding me as last year and being (essentially) forced into meeting new ones. I love it, but I don't....it's complicated.

One thing is constant! One thing is sure! "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever" (Hebrews 13:8). Jesus, thanks for not changing. Thanks for being here--with me, all the time. Sure, I can't really "feel" God with me, but I can know and trust he is here.

When change comes, we must remember that A) we are not alone, in more ways than one, and B) without change, we cannot grow!

This will be an interesting journey. I can't see what the end looks like (and I've stopped bothering to try), but I want to come out more like Jesus. I want to love and know God. I want others to see him in me. 

Let's begin. Round 2.

That One Time I Couldn't Accept Canadian Currency

So there's this thing about living and working in the Northwoods. It's called "meeting Canadians." Now, to be honest, my Northwoods are still a few hours from the Great White North, but it's still close. Once in a while, the following happens at the toy store:

"Hi there, all set?"

(nods)

(scanning items)

"Alrighty, your total is $7.54."

(customer fishing around in wallet and/or pockets)

(silence)

"Uh, do you accept Canadian quarters?"

The hard thing is that these people (Canadians or otherwise...don't get me wrong, this isn't just something Canadians do. Also, I have some dear Canadian friends back at school, so nothing against anyone here) are sincerely genuine. They really hope and believe that their foreign currency will work. After all, it's still a quarter of some kind, and it looks like an American quarter, and it has value to the Canadian government. But, being an American store, no matter how far north we are, we can't accept it. It's not the right kind of cash. There is only one kind of quarter we can take, and that is the American one.

It makes me think about the Gospel. Think of how many good people are out there--nice people who volunteer at the local soup kitchen, knit scarves for unwed mothers, and donate money to the cancer research fund. Most people attend some kind of religious service, and a lot of folks might even read their Bibles. However, Jesus says in John 14:6: 

"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to Father except through me."

James adds:

"You believe there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that--and shudder" (1:19). 

You can believe in a god, or even the One True God, all you want. Without belief in Jesus Christ, though, it doesn't have any value. It doesn't mean anything simply to "believe" (take that, you lying secular inspirational office posters). After all, even the minions of Satan himself believe in God!

Jesus is the only way. He is the gate to the Father. You cannot know the Father without the Son (John 14:7, 8:19). 

What do you believe about Jesus? What do you think about his claims to be the Son of God (John 8:58, John 4:24-25, Mark 14:60-62, and more).

I have seen the truth, and His name is Christ. 

That One Time I Watched a Movie by Myself

I don't frequently spend time alone. I love to be with people too much, BUT yesterday night I was really needing some Kaitlyn time. (Translation: half watching a movie on my computer and half watching my brother play video games.) So, I was feeling an old favorite--you know, a "classic," so I started watching the movie "Grease." You know, that great movie with John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John, with the great music, and the great '50s stuff.

Since when is that movie all about sex?

It was one of the huge, double-take, what? moments. I've seen the film before, but I never remembered it being this bad. I had to skip so much of the movie, and it bothered me how this is hailed as a classic, yet its content is completely focused on the sexual encounters between a bunch of teenagers.

This is what the world celebrates, promotes, and encourages. As Christians, this is not what we are called to believe, and yet it would so easy to walk away from a film like that and subconsciously agree with its messages. Throughout the film,  the male characters talk about how girls are only good for "one thing" (sex), and the heroine of the film isn't "cool" or truly a part of the gang until she turns herself into a sex object and gives up everything she stands for in order to keep her guy. Sex is treated lightly, virginity is seen as gross and stupid. Sex is seen as an "everyone's doing it" sort of thing. Unfortunately, "Grease" isn't alone in this. The majority of media today are promoting, whether subtly or blatantly, that sex is the answer and the goal. Worse, sex is equated with love.

The Word of God points to purity with our bodies: sexually, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. It's not simply avoiding certain things; purity is to pursue righteousness, that is, to pursue living the way God calls us to live. "Flee from sexual immorality," Paul writes to the Corinthians; he doesn't say "Don't have sex and that equals purity." Purity is living according to the Word of God (Psalm 119:9). Purity is being washed from our sins by the blood of Christ and striving to live in step with the Spirit, who is working in us to make us more like Christ (Galatians 5:16). Purity is treating sex the way we are supposed to: between one man and one woman in marriage,  reflecting the intimacy between the Trinity, between Christ and the church, and between God and the individual believer. We are "to control [our] bodies in holiness and honor" (1 Thess. 4:4). 

Do you have a biblical view of sex? Have you been simply ingesting what the world has been telling you? What do you really believe about these things? 

Our bodies were not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord. Therefore, let us glorify the Lord--with our bodies (what we do), with our minds (what we think), and with our lives (in everything). See clearly. See the truth: you were made for more than what the world is telling you to pursue. 

That One Time it was My Birthday

I got mistaken for a twelve-year-old today. Kind of a weird deal, seeing that I'm nowhere close.

I celebrated my birthday this past week, It was awesome; I love birthdays. However, it's strange to really sit down and think about time. Have you ever done it? I mean, really: we cannot stop it. We cannot control it. It just...goes. Time flies, passes, moves, and rolls on. We cannot feel it, but we are all encased by it and it affects everyone. The fourth dimension. Attempts have been made in vain to slow it down, to control it, to manipulate it, but answers don't lie in our hands.

As a matter of fact, they lie in a Book. They lie in the hands of the Master.

I find it comforting and yet also astounding that God is outside of space and time. What does that mean? What does that look like? How would that feel? It's like trying to explain the smell of blue or coax ice cream from a flower. How does that even work?

For our Lord, a day is like a thousand years, and he is everlasting forever and ever (Psalm 90:4, 2). He makes all things happen at their proper times, cannot change, and does not age like we do (Hebrews 13:8). He is beyond; he is holy, wholly other and separate. 

And yet, he loves us. Not the kind of love the world gives, but the deepest, most profound, sacrificial love. He died so we could be with him (Romans 5:8). He cares for us when we, who are constricted and conflicted by time, cannot even begin to give back the praise he deserves. 

This is the Jesus I follow. I am a selfish worm, but he forgives me. He has given me light and life and hope. He is eternal, and  because of his great love, we can spend that "time" with him in forever.

Time was invented by God and belongs to him. He has given me today, and how I choose to use this time is up to me. I pray for the Spirit to help me glorify him with this time and not waste it doing things that don't matter. Do you waste it? Or serve the Lord with it? Do you love people? Or do you ignore them? Do you foolishly drain it on worldly entertainments, sin, or lusts? Or do you invest in prayer and the Word of the Lord? Do you share the Gospel? The choice is yours.

Look up and see the Father of all. He has given you the gift of life, and I pray you steward it well. 

Veritas and Vision

It's the one possession of mine that I value the most, yet it's the one I think about the least. I take it for granted, I forget it exists, but I absolutely require it every day. I cannot function without it. 

My glasses.

I only have one pair. I cannot see without them.

So it is with the Word of God. Without the truth, all I can see is a distorted picture of what the world insists is reality. The Scriptures reveal what is and what isn't. 

For example.

The world tells me beauty is defined by the skinniness of my legs, the hourglass symmetry of my waist, and the clarity of my skin. However, we are all still "beautiful" on the inside, even though we all know that's not really true (but nobody says so), and we do have a defined picture of beauty (which is ingrained into us by the world to begin with and without God is impossible to overhaul). Without social media, streams of pretty "selfies," and funny videos, how am I ever going to gain friends, though? Besides, love is simply a physical attraction culminating in a sexual encounter, and when I get tired of those things or the "chemistry fades," I am fully entitled to walk away. Love is also based on my feelings. People are good at the core and don't need God; after all, he doesn't exist anyway, for if he did, why is there so much pain? I can live, laugh, and love and be fully fulfilled and happy. 

At the core of these statements dwell falsehoods. Lies. Untruths. 

Author and speaker Ravi Zacharias once put it this way: "Truth is the perfect perception of reality." Without the truth, without our eyes being opened by the Bible, all we can see are lies. Why else do broken young women seek love in broken young men and wonder, when the door slams, what went wrong? Why do the hardiest party-ers feel endless emptiness and loneliness despite being surrounded by "happy" people? How come popularity truly fulfills no one? Why don't alcohol and stylish clothing and drugs solve my problems? How come everything my culture tells me to do doesn't work?

Answer? Because the world has fed us lies. And they only lead to dead ends.

I've been reflecting a lot recently on what Paul told the church at Colossae about such things. He writes in 2:8, "See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than Christ." I confess that I've heard and read this verse many times. In fact, I've read and heard many verses many times, but I can't say that I've digested them and took them in as reality and truth. I've looked at the glasses sitting on the table and talked about how much I need them without actually putting them on! I've caught myself, by God's grace, buying into the empty lies of this world. 

I'm recalling a piercing conversation with a friend several months ago about "head" vs. "heart" knowledge. Most have heard the terms tossed about in Christian circles. They refer to God's truths from the Word that you know or have studied versus truths that you feel compelled by or are living out "from your heart" (baloney, I know now). He told me there was no such thing in the Bible as I vehemently insisted that my personal experience proved otherwise. He looked me in the face and said, "Maybe you just aren't applying what you've learned. Maybe you don't really know these truths from the Word, because if you did, you would be living them out." That is the ticket! We can hold a pair of glasses, admire them, tell everyone on planet earth that we see by them, but if we do not put them on, we are living the same distorted reality as everyone else who is still a slave to sin and the world!

Without understanding that everything the world gives us is a lie, we still attempt to justify walking in sinful paths. Unless we pray earnestly for the Spirit to examine our hearts (Psalm 26:2, 139:23), we could still be believing the falsehoods of the world without even realizing it. If we do not truly live by the Word of God, the only perfect reality and the only truth that tells us what's really going on, we will be seduced. 

Look at the Word. Put the glasses on and see. Things are not as they seem, and God says so. 

Ticks and Tantrums

Living in the Northwoods, there is a constant expectation that your day will, at some point, be rudely interrupted by a grotesque and hideous monster known formally as Ixodes Scapularis. In laymen's terms, you may know them as ticks. My count this summer is seven, one being a deer tick (known for carrying Lyme disease) and one deciding to show up on the back of my neck at 11:37pm in the middle of my shower.

Gross gross gross gross gross.

A lot about life is gross. People can leave a sour taste in our mouths. Memories can disgust us and the news can make us want to throw up or run away. When the ticks of our days invade our carefully cultivated comfortable spaces, we are faced with the decision on how we're going to handle them.

Conflict resolution, anyone?

I believe there are three ways to handle these things. The first way was so aptly and sadly demonstrated by an 8-year-old boy at the toy store yesterday. As I rang up his grandmother's purchase, he began to whine and complain to her about wanting a toy that he already had. She was impatient; he was grabbing her arm; the whining increased to what I will call "scene-making" level. The tantrum had officially started.

That's way No. 1: throw a fit. Whack out. Scream and throw things and yell and explode in an attempt to get rid of the problem and get life back on track the way you want it.

Secondly, we can do the opposite. We can run away, or, if that's not possible, pretend it never happened. When the fight happens, the ugliness is revealed, the words are spat out, some folks' initial reaction is to metaphorically plug their ears and say "la la la....not listening!" In Edith Wharton's classic Age of Innocence, the plot centers around a young gentleman's upcoming marriage in late-19th century New York. The upper-crust society thrives on rules, the chiefest being a strict avoidance policy of anything unpleasant. Newland Archer, the protagonist, is forced to grapple with this culture built upon embracing trivialities and ignoring confrontation, interruption, and problems.

But, what does Christ call us to do? How are we called to deal with life's interruptions in a God-honoring way? I believe the answer lies in the Apostle James's letter. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance" (1:2-3).

There we go. When the "ticks" invade, we are to face them with joy, because we are told the effect they will have on our spiritual lives! Strengthened faith. Endurance. Reliance on the Lord. It may be gross, it may be hard, it may be terrible. Your natural inclination is probably going to be to run away, freak out, or staple a smile to your broken visage, but as Christians we are called to something higher and better and more rewarding. We gain nothing if we revert back to the flesh; our faith can't grow unless we obey and walk in a manner worthy of how we've been called. If we do not trust that God's instructions are for our eternal benefit (and that he will guide and empower us through the Spirit to obey those instructions), help me understand how you expect to mature in your faith?

My Savior once said, "If you love me, obey my commands" (John 14:15). We are to fix our eyes on Christ and face life's interruptions with joy, not only because God tells us to, but because we can know and anticipate the spiritual results of our trials! Who doesn't want a more intimate relationship with our Lord? If it takes an ocean of ticks for me to know and love God more, bring it.