Repenting Hype

I love hype.

A few hysterical people. Late-night adventures. Music. Party atmosphere. Something crazy, someone yelling, everyone doubled over with laughter so hard that they can't breathe. Definitely something worth writing about later or maybe a sarcasm battle that turns into a new inside joke. If you know anything about Enneagrams, this is the full-out 7 side making an appearance.

I get such an emotional "high" from being with people. Having dozens of dear, genuine friends is a blessing I've only encountered since coming to college. For an extrovert like me, it's the picture-perfect situation to be in. I thank God over and over for gifting me with friends. I deserve nothing, and yet he's given me the one thing my heart craves most: relationships with other Christians.

And yet.

Yes, there's always a "yet," always a B-side to the blessings and gifts. Everything we receive from Jesus can be sinfully abused and misused if we don't steward well and seek to glorify him in all areas of our lives. 

This struggle is very real. Idolizing happens. 

The cleverness turns into the "Me" show. I abuse my friends' time and emotions, seeking them only when I want fulfillment. The sarcasm is poorly played and jabs places it shouldn't. Jesus is left by the wayside as fun turns into breaking rules and calling attention to us rather than Him.

How about this: He never even comes up in the conversation.

I am being truthful in saying this is one of my biggest struggles. I can't keep throwing God to the sidelines and act like I can receive ultimate satisfaction from my relationships. I can't keep switching into "look-at-me" mode and then go back to my Bible when the party's over, repenting in my journal and apologizing for pride.

I need help. And that can only come from God.

Look to Jesus. Look to Jesus. Look to Jesus.

He is the only true source of fulfillment! That "low" I get when the music stops and the night ends and everyone goes home? When the last thing I want to do is be alone? Good grief, woman, Jesus never left!

The truth is hard to live out when our feelings disagree. I'm in the crux of this battle when it comes to the fantastic fellowship of my brothers and sisters. It seems like nothing is more worthwhile than being with my friends, but that's hardly true. Jesus has given me these relationships, and the last thing I want to do is abuse them or idolize them.

So, Lord, I beg forgiveness. I repent of my pursuit of hype over You. Spirit, be the center and fill me up so I can discern what is right and wise, even in the midst of the fun and blessings you've given me.

Help me to see.

Repenting Ignorance

Do we believe that what we believe is really real?

How much is lies, and how much is truth?

I ended up in a black-hole-style conversation after dinner last night with two friends of mine. After a full day of homework, football, rain, and exploring Old Town, I was more than happy to talk.

We hit everything: self-perception, the culture wars, feminism's impact on relationships, and why men and women have such skewed views of one another.

These were guys, and I'm so grateful because I needed to hear that others, especially my male contemporaries, are thinking through and are concerned about the same things I am. 

Our discussion left me thinking...how ignorant am I to the lies of this world slipping into my mind and shaping my beliefs?

Hear me out. Our culture absolutely contributes to who we are; we can't change our familiarity and context. However, we can change what we choose to believe about people, God, and ourselves. Our minds have been transformed by the Holy Spirit--we are now capable of understanding the truth, for we are new creations (2 Cor 5:17). We don't have to ingest the lies of the world anymore, and we don't have to be ignorant to what's really going on here.

The lies. They surround us, but we have the truth of God that's as sharp and penetrating as anything (Heb 4:12). The truth sets us free (John 8:32). The truth is Jesus Christ, the only mediator between God and man (1 Tim 2:5). Our eyes can be opened.

We can know that we are valued. We can know that there is hope and eternal life. We can know and live and bank on the fact that Jesus rose from the grave, defeating death and providing the ultimate "Yes" to the promises of God (2 Cor 1:20). We can love, and we can have true community and fellowship with one another because of God in us.

This morning I went out with my dearest friends to celebrate a birthday. We baked croissants, got coffee, and walked down Michigan Avenue to recreate the famous Audrey Hepburn scene from the film "Breakfast at Tiffany's." Amid the overwhelming aura of materialism, homeless people, trash, and cardboard boxes dot the chrome landscape. Right next to some of the biggest and most lavish department stores in the world are broken, beaten people and the remnants of their lives. The stores try so hard to camouflage the "clutter," but there's no way you can't see it's all there.

However, if you choose to shut your eyes and ignore the lies, you'd probably never notice. 

What are you "seeing"? What are you believing? There's only two options: the Truth, or the lies of this world that will only pull you under til you can't breath anymore.

Repenting Mr. Darcy

There's no such thing as the perfect man.

Outwardly, everyone affirms my previous statement: Of course. We all know that. Yep.

Look in your heart.

If you are single today, if you are married today, if you are dating today, do you carry the terribly incorrect belief that your future/current spouse is supposed to be a certain way and act like this and behave just the way you want? That's called playing God.

That's called sin. That's called being selfish.

We tend to assume that the other person needs to be perfect. We tend to make them into an idol. Worst of all, we tend to make them Jesus. 

Relationships are a tricky thing. We are saved and redeemed by God, but we all still struggle with sin. We can truly love, but we still carry scars and have difficulty relating--heck, we don't even know ourselves fully. If we don't keep our eyes wide open and contend in prayer, we will cling to an unrealistic image and make a man (or woman) into our savior. 

I can testify to the temptation here. It's so easy to come up with a list of things I "want" in a boyfriend/husband and then reject every single person who doesn't exactly fit that meticulous image. I can easily make a friendship into something it's not or abuse the feelings of a young man because I want him to be like the perfectly debonair Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. Manipulation. Control. All the things that I'm not supposed to do, I want to do in order to satisfy my pride. Going too deep too fast--we all want to do that, too, instead of letting things play out in a healthy fashion. The heart is deceitfully wicked; who can understand it? (Jer. 17:9).

A lot of it boils down to pride and thinking I know what's best for me rather than trusting God and keeping things in an open palm. Relying on truth over feelings is always the skeleton key. In all honesty, remaining calm and peaceful and letting relationships develop slowly, over time, in a pure way, is the best. 

Love Jesus with absolutely everything you are, so much that it makes me more like Jesus to be around you. Add in mutual interest, which (for me, at least) cancels out a ton.

Ta-da. I think that's a good start. 

See your brothers and sisters around you and know that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, but we are justified freely through Christ's gift of salvation. Romans 3:23-24.

Lord, forgive us for thinking others can be as perfect as you. Forgive us for thinking we know what is best and for not believing you provide your children with good gifts. 

Repenting Anti-Patriotism

What does it mean to love your country?

This past week, our campus has had several speakers share with us the grave state of America. We are heading for destruction. Our government is running in circles, accomplishing nothing of substance. Israel and ISIS demand an answer. Meanwhile, we're slaughtering our own children by the millions and claiming it's only the politically correct thing to do. 

Things are hardly getting better. Today's anniversary of the 9/11 attack has brought a sad state of mind to my campus, and the chilly weather underscores the seriousness of our nation's well-being. 

I've been hit over the head by my lack of love and gratefulness for this country. America is definitely going down the tank, but when was the last time I prayed for my government? For the salvation of my leaders and wisdom for those in power? For God to intervene? For strength to speak the truth and to stand up when I need to?

When was the last time I prayed for the American church to do something?

Ashamedly, I confess my lack of patriotism because I haven't been praying for my nation. My "love" for America has translated into an attitude of taking things for granted.

We cannot ignore where the world is at. It is sin for us as believers to see evil and pretend it will "go away." We must be interceding in prayer on behalf of our brothers and sisters around the world who are in terrible suffering by dark forces. 

Wherever you are, have you been praying for our persecuted family? Do you pray for your own country's leaders? 

My new roommate is from Texas. She is sweet and wonderful and kind, but also has a deep vein of patriotism running through her. (Anecdote 1: us hanging up a Texan flag at 12:30am). One thing she has taught me is the importance of persevering in our prayers even when it seems pointless; forgive us, Lord, for thinking prayer isn't powerful! We don't know why God has all this happening right now, but we can trust he has a plan. We can count on his tears for Israel and desire to see the nations come to repentance. We can count on the Lord's love for presidents and terrorists alike because he loves all of us, too. 

Even though we may feel like Habakkuk crying out to the Lord in 1:2 ("How long, Lord, must I call for help but you do not listen? Or cry out to you, 'Violence!' but you do not save?"), we can be confident and sobered in knowing he has a plan.

We just can't see the end of it yet. 

Repenting the "Sexy Christian" Image

“If you could speak to the entire female population on this campus, what would you want to tell them?”

We had gone out late to get ice cream cones and were back on campus throwing philosophies and thoughts back and forth. Cans of worms are my favorite late-night snack, and I was offering this one to Archie. 

It took him a while to think, but here is what he, interestingly, responded with. He said he would tell them not to be easily convinced by the men around them who aren't all who they say they are. He said there's a lot of fakers and masks, specifically one called the "Sexy Perfect Christian Man." He said too many guys are trying to put on this image in order to be accepted and get girls’ attention without truly being themselves and truly being all in for Jesus.

“I know; I’ve tried to be that guy.” He was blunt and honest. 

When being a Christ-follower becomes the “cool” thing to do, we need to reevaluate. As far as I can see, Jesus was murdered, abandoned, and hated. His disciples were slaughtered, his people targeted. The church, HIS body, has been attacked since Pentecost. Jesus promised us this. Exhibit A: Mark 13:13, John 15:18, Matthew 10:22. 

There is no such thing as a popular Christian; it’s an oxymoron. The world is SUPPOSED to hate us. Granted, I hope that among ourselves as believers, we love one another, but a consequence of our Bible-college-campus subculture has been this subtle erection of a hierarchy. It’s like high school at times, and, as Archie described it, there’s the Christianized version of the jocks: the brooding, deep, theological men who dress well and act all serious and the girls love them.

There is a sad ring of truth here that applies to believers everywhere. Because of the heavy individualism of American culture, I feel it's hit the USA the hardest. Unfortunately, as our faith has become juvenilized over time and the world has seeped in, the normal human struggle of wanting to be well-liked has morphed into this perverted, Jesus-ified version of a popularity contest for guys and girls alike. If left unchecked, we find we're not studying the Word to know God but rather to impress others; we're praying to look good; we value appearing like solid Christians over actually being solid Christians who can think apart from the fallen culture around us.

Jesus addressed such matters—the people who know what is right but put on a false image in order to squeeze admiration out of those around them and be viewed highly in society. We know them from the Gospels and from history: they were called Pharisees, and Jesus called them hypocrites.

Would you give up your “cool” if Christ asked you to? Well, this is gospel: He has.

Being a Christian is never about you. The only thing individual about Christianity is that Christ calls individuals. Being in the body of believers is collective, for Jesus died not for just your sin but for SIN. Our carefully cultivated images shatter when it comes to the grace of God. We are free to be ourselves, not a distorted copy of what some obscure subculture declares as attractive and “cool.”

See the truth. Drop the mask. Be who you really are.

“Then He said to the crowd, ‘If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me’” (Luke 9:23).