Faces and Fakers

Everyone has a mask. You know what I'm talking about.

The plastered smile we stick on when we've having the worst day but we don't want to say anything. The bright face we glue on haphazardly when we're deeply struggling with sin and worry and fear, but we want to remain "good Christians" in the eyes of our peers. The persona we slip into subconsciously in order to avoid dealing with our pain, shame, and problems.

When we want to be someone else. When we manufacture someone else and zip ourselves into them. When we cycle through endless "someone elses" because we are avoiding our deepest regrets and desires. 

Masks. 

This is an issue that is a constant battle for me. Before knowing Christ, I struggled immensely with seeking acceptance and attempting to please everybody. I wanted everyone to like me. I wanted attention and a good reputation.

I was looking for identity by throwing myself into everyone else's context instead of looking inwardly at the root of my problems. 

Even after Christ, this is an intense war that demands my focus on the promises of God. If I, even without thinking about it, slide back into old habits of creating personas and acting not myself, I cause a lot of damage. Being yourself is a lot harder than we are led to believe. I have to check my motives every day. Am I wearing lipstick today to stand out and capture someone's attention? Is this remark just to look clever? Does my schedule reflect a heart that's genuinely interested in others, or is it all about cramming it full simply to impress others with how much I can handle? Galatians 1:10, anyone? Whose servant am I?

When we examine our hearts, we find them to be much more wicked than we originally thought. Sitting in on a Monsters in Literature class today positioned me for some excellent remarks by the professor, who aptly quipped, "Don't ever assume anything about anyone." We can never assume that we are above any kind of sin, and believing that everything is fine is called denial and pride.  We are not fine. We need God's help, especially when confronting ourselves.

We must weigh our actions carefully. We must cling to the Word of God, where we read about this mighty and perfect thing called grace, which stems from the love of our Father who has called us his children. The second I look to myself to try and garner favor is the moment I call God a liar for saying my salvation is by his grace. I DON'T HAVE TO TRY ANYMORE. IT'S ALREADY BEEN DONE, AND I'VE ALREADY BEEN ACCEPTED INTO THE GREATEST FAMILY THERE IS.  

Daily, I must yank my eager eyes away from the approving glances of man, and glue them to the only One whose love has already been given despite my failure. Let us fix our eyes upon Him as our masks are thrown away and our humble, true selves are exposed the way they were meant to be.